The Harvard Museum of Natural History. . . are refreshingly honest about why they have removed one of their exhibits.
Laptop self charger
Brilliant. Now just for wireless power and were sorted
Joy of Photoshop (url)
What it’s like to play online games as an adult.
Got to admit I wouldn't have put the scissors there...
They say so many people die because of alcohol..
Perhaps they never realized how many of them are born because of it.
Most scousers can trace their family tree back at least 15 generations.
All the way back to 1980.
I went to a feminist picnic the other day.
It was great, apart from the fact no one made any sandwiches
I just got sentenced to 15 years for assisted suicide and I'm really regretting my foolish actions.
I should never have given that woman a 'pass' on her driving test.
"The handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch out after you wear them awhile."
"If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."
"So, you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"
"Yes sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?"
"Warning! You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."
"The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or dog?"
"Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."
"Life's tough, it's tougher if you're stupid."
"No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want."
"Just how big were those two beers?
"In God we trust, all others are suspects."
3 old ladies were sitting in their retirement home reminiscing. The first lady recalled shopping at the grocers and demonstrated with her hands, the length and thickness of a cucumber she could buy for a penny.
The second old lady nodded, adding that onions used to be much bigger and cheaper also, and demonstrated the size of two big onions she could buy for a penny a piece.
The third old lady remarked, 'I can't hear a word you two are saying, but I remember the guy you're talking about.'
HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR 2030?
Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world "Little India" formerly known as Australia.
Jersey executes last remaining Greenie.
White minorities still trying to have English recognised as UK's third language.
Children from two-parent heterosexual families bullied in schools for being 'different'. Tolerance urged.
Gay Marriages now overtake heterosexual marriages as preferred 'lifestyle' choice.
Manchester schoolgirl expelled for not wearing Burqa: Being a Christian is no excuse says school. Sharia law must be enforced.
Japan announces that they will no longer consume whale meat as whales are now extinct and the scientific research fleet are unemployed. UK Government has told the Japanese that Grey Squirrels taste like whale meat.
Britain now has ten Universities of Political Correctness. Professor Goldman of LSPC says there is still a long way to go in the fight to stop people saying what they think.
Britain's deficit £10 trillion and rising. Government declares return to surplus in 100 years which is 300 years ahead of time. Prime Minister Mohammed Yousuf claims increased growth through more immigration is the secret to success.
Wall Street banks merge to form new super bank, Goldman Rothschild Ebeneezer Epstein Drescher (GREED): Huge bonuses paid to executives to celebrate launch.
Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped.
Iran still quarantined. Physicists estimate it will take at least ten more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
France pleads for global help after being taken over by Islamic Countries. No other country volunteers to come forward to help the beleaguered nation! Serves them right.
Castro finally dies at age 112. Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
Jose Manuel Rodrigez Bush says he will run for second term as US President in 2032.
Post Office raises price of stamps to £18 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
After a ten year £75.8 billion study, commissioned by the Labour Party: Scientists prove diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.
Average weight of a British male drops to 18 stone.
Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights. Victims to be held partly responsible for crime.
Average height of professional basketball players is now nine feet, seven inches.
New law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2035 as lethal weapons.
Inland Revenue sets lowest tax rate in decades at 75 per cent.
Bradford won this years FA cup final beating the Hindu Hornets 4-1.